Chico's Tattoo

This was taken on Chiq's cell phone a couple hours after it was done.

Pictures from Alicia

To go with her recent stories.






To go with her recent stories.

The Prince

Anna sent this on october 23, 2003 :

"My stinky old mutt,
a prince among dogs.
His beautiful spirit outlived his ailing body.
Truly loved & truly loving.

found: April 26, 1994 Portland, OR
lost: October 20, 2003 South Salem, NY

my first love..."

I was always terrified of Puppa. Was it that if I went to hug Anna he would try to bite my butt off? Was it because if I made any movement that resembled dancing, he would try to rip my throat out? Or was it that strangely human look in his eye?

Maybe it was because Anna loved him so much that I knew that he must be a creature of superior quality.

....No, he was a little scary.

Anna Lo is a Right-On Mama

"Iraqi babies deserve to grow up too."
"Iraqi mommies deserve to see their babies grow up too."
...and I think Chiq had an 'Iraqi Daddies' shirt. Can't remember which march these shirts were for, I just remember them all freezing and proud. How many marches did Anna take Ruby to?

The other shirt is
"Save your soul and your country
Dump Bush
Vote Kerry"
I think that was just for every day wear.

What were the other anti- bush tees that she had? She had, ahem, Quite A Few.

Here is a blurrrrry pic of A Lo and B Lo- that's Ruby Avila at home in New Yawk a few years ago. It's storytelling with Ru- I believe she is hamming it up for the benefit of her Mama, Jody and Denk and me- we are on the sofa facing her. Oh Ma looks so proud of her little star... then, for her closing act, Ruby slammed the book shut, rolled back, kicked her legs in the air and flashed the audience... proving she's a real Lobianco with nothing to hide.

Tee Shirts

Anna's directions to making Iron On shirts:
1. Buy T Shirt Transfers. She did not specify brand (but I used Avery).
2. Choose or design the art and/or the message to print on the transfer.
3. When printing on to the transfer sheet, be sure to first find in your printer settings the "Print Mirror Image" box to check off. (This way any type will iron on correctly)
4. Follow directions included with the transfers but be sure to iron slightly longer than the directions say and be sure to focus on the corners!
5. Be sure to wash inside out, but still expect some fading & cracking.

My collection of the shirts she made.

superhero

My first memory of her is when she grabbed the mic. in assembly during a discussion of how we felt about the fact that the administration had announced they were going to call the parents of any kids they heard were having unchaperoned parties on the weekends, and thundered,
"IF YOU DO THAT, YOU'RE GONNA DESTROY THE BOND OF TRUST I HAVE WITH MY PARENTS!!!! It's UP TO ME TO TELL MY PARENTS IF I'M GONNA HAVE A PARTY! YOU CAN"T DESTROY THE TRUST!!!!" She was two years older than me, a junior, and I was a freshman...well, you remember how it was at that age--she might as well have been a superhero. I was always friends with some of her friends in high school—Noah and Adam, Phoebe and John Hamburg. Then, after college I became very close with Ali Marsh..so, I've been a degree removed but also always around her for most of our lives. And I have to say, she’s the only person I ever knew who could still, just by her very presence, make me feel like an intimidated 15 year-old trying to make friends. And that bond with her parents she insisted upon in assembly, and with her family as a whole was strongly in evidence when I happened to be seated behind you guys at her Dalton graduation. I will never forget how loud you clapped and how wildly you cheered. Completely disregarding the initial warnings to keep applause until the very end, you guys went nuts, and it was amazing. I remember so clearly thinking to myself (an only child with very few relatives): now that’s a family.

One of the last times I saw her was actually a night that a bunch of us had gathered at Ali’s house because Adam was in town...so just like high school it was me and a lot of ‘seniors.’ But it was great-- Maud initiated this game where we all had to say what one TV show we watched in secrecy, loving it but totally ashamed. I can’t remember anyone’s answer but I remember how we bonded through the absurdity of what we privately loved. I remember Anna showing me pictures of Ruby and Dario (on another night at Ali’s a few years earlier, when Ruby was just a baby, I spent most of the night in the bedroom holding her and marveling at what great parents she and chiq were, and how amazingly she was just the same Anna, but with a baby now) and how proud she seemed, but in a quiet way. That night we shared a cab home and chatted, about nothing in particular as we flew up the West Side. I remember thinking as I got out, before her, and headed home, that that was probably the first time in 17 years I felt really at ease with Anna. It turned out that she had been diagnosed that day. I never got over how genuinely happy she seemed that night, even though she knew she had breast cancer.

I guess the thing about Anna that strikes me most is how complete of a person she was at such a young age, and then always. In Portland, in New York, with a baby, with two, with cancer... she had this incredible sense of self, so sturdy, so strong, which is I think so hard for most of us to find, especially as women, and which many of us spend our entire lives searching for. We weren’t close, Anna and I, but she absolutely affected me and has already inspired me to go back to working with kids as a court appointed special advocate. Really, it was something I had trained to do, but let go of, until her memorial service which moved me so, I felt an obligation to honor her memory by taking action on behalf of the kinds of kids she clearly spent her time working with and fighting for.

Nina, I cant begin to imagine the depth of your loss, but my thoughts and prayers have been and will continue to be with you and the rest of your amazing family.

From my heart,
Amanda Guinzburg

[Amanda sent this (and the above picture from Ali's 35th birthday party) to me on 7/30/06 and this p.s. on 2/20/07:]

I wanted to add a little something to this, which is that after that assembly my little freshman friends and I lived in awestruck fear of the power and legend that had instantly become Anna. We were certain in addition to being extremely vocal and strong-willed she had to be...well, mean. Later that year a couple of my friends made it onto the Varsity Softball team and that season the team got to go to Florida for some reason. Well, somehow my anxious little buddies (in my mind they actually are tiny, like lilliputtianly small) wound up having to room with Anna..needless to say they left NYC in terror. And, as it will surprise no one here, I'm sure, I have a vivid memory of the first words they said upon their return: "Anna LoBianco is SO NICE!" They proceeded to regale me with stories of her generosity and warmth and humor. And they wore her friendship like the badge of honor I now know it really was.
--Amanda

Some photos...

...because right now, I have no words.

The Many Faces of Anna

This email is from one of Anna's teachers from Bank St.

Hi Nina Nina, David Wolkenberg here, Anna's teacher when she was in the 5-6's at Bank Street. I was at the memorial today. It was so interesting for me to hear what was said about her. Some of it corresponded to my memories of her, and some significant qualities did not. I found her to be very caring, very kind, very gentle, very supportive, very helpful, and sort of quiet, sort of in repose. Very beautiful eyes. When Anna looked at you, you had been looked into. I never saw the warrior, the overt intensity, the occasional ferocity.

At Bank Street, teachers had individual meetings with each child's parents. One in the fall, and one in the spring, toward the end of the school. Parent Conferences they were (are) called. I very distinctly remember one aspect of my meetings with Dora and Tony. When I described how she was in the classroom, her (your) parents were incredulous. "She never yells or screams," was their question. "She never shouts or gets furious?" "No, she is very even and steady." Dora and Tony described some of the goings on at home, and I observed that she was very different in school. She wasn't tense or inhibited or constrained. She was very relaxed and peaceful. We were very fond of each other.

So, I heard again today the Anna not in my classroom. I loved hearing it. I retired in June of 2001 after 30 years of teaching at Bank Street. Always the 5's-6's, always in the same classroom. I have maintained contact with the school. A couple of years ago someone told me that Anna LoBianco was working there. I was frequently on the verge of going to visit her, or at least emailing her, to make a connection with the adult Anna. I didn't. I'm very reluctant to come in on a person's life when I had a relationship her/him years ago. So, the possibility has irrevocably passed, and I am very sorry about that. I went rooting through my Bank Street photographs, thinking I had a class picture when I was Anna's teacher. I found it, scanned it, and here it is.

The attachment, the photo, is not very sharp because the original isn't. I played around with it a little in Adobe Photoshop but that didn't work out. A fuzzy photo cannot be made clearer, it just becomes worse. Having lived through various deaths I know that the excruciating pain takes a very long time to diminish, even just a little.

So my heart goes out to you. You are in for a rough time.
Best
David

(As if it wasn't perfectly obvious, Anna is center row, third from the right...And there's Paulette, bottom row, all the way to the right.)